This post is all about regrets...things that you do and then wish you never did them...I guess these past few days have been regretful days. So that you may understand my feelings of regret let me backtrack a bit.
A while ago I got three new students that are from SP and work for IBM as consultants... IBM closed off a huge deal here in Fortaleza so they sent 13 consultants to work for them here. Daniel was one of them. He stays two weeks here in Fortaleza and then goes to SP for a weekend and then is back here to Fortaleza...and the routine repeats itself over and over. IBM is repsonsible to pay for all their expenses so they stay "living" in a fancy hotel/flat right in front of the beach. There is also the taxi and restaurant bills which are part of the package deal of having to work (and live too) so far away from family and friends.
I remember our first class as if it were today:
*Buzzzz*
Door cracks open halfway. A second later it is wide open and I smile back at the smile that is smiling at me. I take in the features: Hot jap in tan skin (thats what happens when you live right in front of the beach) wearing black surf shorts and a white sweatshirt hung to his well toned chest and arms. About 25 I guessed. Not too tall, not too short. I would say perfect height if I wasnt into tall men ( I guess about every woman is!)
-Daniel?
-Hi teacher! *cute grin* Come in! *traditional kiss on both cheeks*
-Thanks.
I make my entrance and plop my large handbag on a chair. He closes the door.
-Feel welcome teacher. Do you want anything? Water? Juice?
-Yes! Actually I wanted to look out your balcony and see the view.
-Oh, okay. *Lets out a little laugh* The smell ruins the view though...there is a seafood restaurant right under and the smell of shrimp and deep fried fish gets to be extreamly nauseating.
-WOW! The view is breathtaking though.
I turn around and walk back to the table where I sit down. He follows suit.
-So Daniel, you are from SP, no? I lived there myself quite a few years ago.
-Really? I was wondering from where you were because when I spoke to you on the phone I noticed you have a strong accent. Are you Brazilian?
-Hahaha...yes, I am. My father is American though - thats why the accent. Well, that and the fact that I dont speak much Portuguese since I work with English all day and at home we pratically only speak English too.
-Cool! Well, other than your accent you do look very Brazilian.
-I'll take that as a compliment.
-It is one so you should.
After the regular small talk the class began, being interrupted many times by casual chit-chat and in the end becoming just a long conversation about ourselves and our lives. He was 24 years old (I got close!) and was here in Fortaleza for almost four months. His mother is Brazilian and his father Japanese. He had lived a year in Japan but for the past few years was living in SP together with his mother and sister. He had a 22 year old girlfriend who he was dating for almost a year. Most likely he would continue to "work/live" here in Fortaleza for at least another year. Maybe more. It was incredible how we hit off so well so quickly. It seemed like we were already great friends. At around 10:00 p.m. (the time the class was over) he walked me to the bus stop and waited with me until my bus arrived. On the bus I felt happy, and by his grin as he waved his hand good-bye I was pretty sure he felt the same.
The next class was three days latter. A few hours before the class he sent me an SMS: "Do you want to go out clubbing tonight? I am going with some friends from work." Somehow he got the wrong cell phone number and it was my Dad that showed me the text on his own cell phone. I giggled and asked him to answer back for me saying the answer was yes. And that is exactly what I father wrote back to him: "The answer is yes!" I would have rathered to have just answered myself with just a simple "yes" but by now the damage was already done.
I arrived at the hotel but he still hadn't gotten back from work so I stayed reading at the lobby while every single male eye stalked me up and down. Geez, what is it with men when they see a "lonely young girl" alone in the hotel lobby? no comments...
At last, from the corner of my eye I saw him jump out of his taxi and walk inside and come towards me. I continued staring at my book pretending I hadnt seen him arrive and was still "deeply absorbed in my book".
-Hi teacher! *same cute grin as always*
-Hello student! I was wondering how long you'd take to arrive.
-I am sorry...trafic was terrible.
-True. This hour of the night its rush hour and it gets horrible. I got your text message.
-I got yours back... "The answer is yes" no?
-That wasnt me. It was my father.
*Puzzled face on his part*
-Long story Daniel. *giggles*
-Okay, whatever!
We went up the elevator and in front of the door of his room he juggled with his keys and then commented:
-Teacher, you look very pretty today. I had to tell my girlfriend you were fat and ugly when she asked me on the phone about you.
-Hahhaa...OMG student. You men...
Once again, class was great and we talked more than anything else. He picked everything up real quick and wasnt shy at all when speaking English which made the learning process a lot easier and quicker too. The class was over but it was still too early to go to the club.
-So...do you want to go eat out or do you want me to cook for you?
-Whatever is good for you. Do you cook well?
-Very well. I have these great macaroni sauce cans. It works wonders!
-Oh...is that what you call cooking well? I should have guessed! But ok, I'll try it!
-Are you sure? If you want we can go somewhere. I know some real nice places.
-Nah, here is good. I feel lazy and here I am already comfortable. Plus, I still need to change my clothes to go out clubbing cause I cant go dressed like this.
I was wearing a long, silky white dress with orange patterns on it with matching low sandals. Definately something I would never wear out to a club. I had stuffed a black jean pants, party shirt and heels in my bag before rushing out the door.
-Okay then. Why dont you take a shower while I prepare the food?
-What? I am not crazy to go barging in your bathroom on my second class.
-Why not? What's so big? You are going to have to go in there to change your clothes so you might as well take a shower as well. I will call room service and they can bring up clean towels, soap, shampoo...I dont know. Whatever you need.
-No student. I would feel weird doing that.
-Yeah right you would. You are crazy teacher.
I laughed out loud at the comment.
-Yes I am...but still...
-There is hot water AND a jacuzzi...dont tell me you'd rather stay all sweaty after working all day.
-Jacuzzi??? Hot water??? Okay, you dont need to try to convince me anymore.
-Can I join you?
-Hah! And then you call me crazy!!! Sure, just hand me over the cell phone so I can warn your girlfriend.
He bursts out in laughter.
-Oh, I just remembered, I need to cook. Forget that offer.
-I thought so...
After the best and most relaxing shower I had had in months I dressed quickly and left the bathroom with my wet hair soaking on the back of my shirt.
-Is the food ready?
-Almost. The sauce is. Just waiting for the macaroni. I am gonna take a shower now, if you dont mind keeping an eye on the macaroni.
-Sure. No problem.
I walked in the kitchen and he turned his gaze towards me his eyes meeting mine.
-Wow teacher! I think I will have to grab you.
-Ihhhhhh student....ta muito safado, em?!
-Christy, may I ask you a question?
-Shoot!
-Did you ever stay with a student? Be honest.
-Honest? nope. I never have and I dont see myself ever staying with one. I dont know...its against my work ethic. Not professional. Its not me to do stuff like that.
-Though lots of your students go after you dont they? Like, try to stay with you, no?
-I guess you could say that. Some of them go as far as telling me they fell in love and blah. But that doesnt change anything for me. I continue being nice to them. When they call me to go out I accept and invite a friend to go along with me too. hehehehe... after a while most of them get over it, and even the ones that keep trying to stay with me do so to a lesser extent... and with others we end up just becoming good friends. I am used to it so its not a big deal anymore.
-I see. I am jealous now.
-You shouldn't be. You have your own girlfriend to be jealous of already. That in itself should be enough work for you.
-Hahaha...she is jealous enough for the both of us. Why do you think I had to tell her you were fat and ugly?
-Aii Daniel. You dont have to tell her that. You can just tell her I am your teacher and that should be enough. Or you could tell her I am married. That usually works.
-Why didnt I think about that before?! I should've.
-Go shower student...go shower.
By the time he left the shower I had finished up with dinner, set the table and was slopped on his double bed watching TV. Good thing about hotels - they always have live cable.
-Teacher, what underwears should I wear?
- Hahahhahahahaa...
-Really teacher. Help me out.
-Why would you need help with that? Who helps you when I am not here? The maid?
-Yuckkkkkk teacher!!!
-I dont know... wear boxers.
He chooses three from his cuboard and brings them over to me.
-Which one?
By now I am laughing histerically at the absurd situation.
-I never thought I would have to go through this as a teacher. Its not included in the package. Though I guess I could now add that to my resumee...what do you think? Here, this one is good.
I point to the closest boxer without even looking at it twice.
-Okay. Those are my favorite.
-That sounds gay student. Only girls have favorite panties and bras. Guys just wear whatever is clean and in front of them.
-What panties are your favorite teacher?
-Hummm...this is getting a bit too intimate for me now.
-Ah cmon. Its just a question.
-Fine. I will answer it as long as you answer my questions too then.
-Now you are asking for too much.
-Well, if you dont give you dont take. Its all equal rights now, dont you remember?
-Okay, okay. But I can lie then right?
-After what you've just said I think even if you told the truth I would end up doubting you. Haahahaha...
That night was one of the best nights I've ever had. After a long talk over dinner in which we both ended up laughing until we thought our bladders would explode we piled the dishes on the sink for room service to take care of next day. There is nothing like living in a hotel. The phone rang interrupting our constant monolouge. Daniel picked it up.
-Alo? Oh hi...no, not yet...its already 11:30 p.m.?!!! Okay, we'll be there soon.
-Who was that? I asked
-One of my friends that we are meeting up with today. They are all from SP - from the IBM.
-Ah, I see.
-He asked me what was going on with us since we were taking so long. They are going to think that we've been going on at it since you are with your hair wet.
-Going on at it???
-Yeah like, you know, having sex.
-Hhahahaa...thats a new way to call it. And my hair is almost dry - most likely it will be completely dry by the time we get there so they wont be able to imagine much.
-Not much more than they already are imagining...
-The way you say it sounds like you have sex with every teacher you've ever had.
-Sick teacher! You are my first girl teacher. I have only had guy teachers so you are my first.
-Ohhh...that explains it all... your new fantasy, hum?
-Maybe...why not? Is it yours too?
I ran over to him and started hitting him playfully while he grabbed me and tickled me back. In the end we were both out of breath and my hair a big tangle.
-Cmon, lets catch a cab! We are already late.
We caught a cab and met up with a few of his workmates at a nice bar. After a few drinks and a lot of casual talk we made our way over to the club. They all drank to their hearts delight and I stayed with my ever constant bottle of water since the next day I had class to give first thing in the morning.
As we grooved on the dance floor he touched my waist, pulled me next to him and kissed me softly. I let his lips linger for a second and then pulled away.
-I am sorry Daniel. I can't do this. You are my student and more than being my student you have a girlfriend...it wouldn't be right, it really wouldn't.
-I am sorry teacher. This never happened to me. You know, I really love my girlfriend, I do. But I haven't ever found myself attracted to someone else that isn't her for the past year and so this all feels real weird.
-Thats fine. It happens.
-I guess next time I will have to get you drunk...
I looked up at his face and saw the corners of his mouth rising and his pathetically cute grin forming...he was joking.
-You are such a clown!!!
-Teacher?
-Yes?
-You are the best teacher ever! *He smiled shyly at me*
-You are my favorite student, student...
-Liar!
I burst into laughter... -Yes I am lying. You are one of my favorite students. Now I am telling the truth.
-I rather the lie.
We laughed once again and continued dancing way off into the night and until the morning rose.
PAUSE. I need to stop this post here. Duty calls. But I will return and finish it in my next post. Hopefully still tonight.
Disclaimer: ALL NAMES ARE FICTITIOUS - dates, places and events are FACTS!!!
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