And once again, here comes a story within a story. To all who don't know who the famous character, Mr. Perfect is, refresh yourself by clicking and reading all about it here and here as I really am not up to recounting the longggggg story over and over again. And for those who already know all the details of my life (or so, know exactly who Mr. Perfect is) then please fasten your seatbelts, pat your bottom down tight and get ready for another long and crazy ride in the story of my life!!!Well, to be completely honest before I start, I haven't been the most faithful and regular person on writing down my blog - especially when it's about my love/sex life. Why? Well, one big and main reason is because that lately has been pretty inexistent. I have this MAJOR crush over one of my students: yep, it's none other than Sexual Fantasy Student. I try as hard as I can to get up and get over him, find someone else to think and daydream about at morning, noon and night - but who says we can put a stop to all the feelings we have? hum? That's just impossible. The most we can do is try to control them, and so lately that is exactly what I have been doing and that's another BIG reason why I have never stayed with him and most likely won't ever do so in the future as well. But since New Year's (I spent New Year's with him) we have become closer and closer friends by the day. We talk about literally EVERYTHING there is to talk about and know each other's life pretty much to a "T". Even when it comes to sex and love life I know who he has gone out with last Friday night and he knows all about the latest creatures of the male species who have asked me out on a date or something of the sorts. Whenever I need a favor or a little helping hand, who do I call? Yep, none other than him. Like Ximena put it the other day "you ask him, as in the end you are the boss and the one who calls the shots anyways." I know that isn't true, but the reason she said that is that whenever I ask him for something or to do something he never fails to be there for me and help me out - and just that in itself is another reason why I end up liking him as much as I do.
But he is a proud guy, and I am a proud girl. And he is my student, and I am his teacher so in the end it stays pretty much in a situation that none of us goes anywhere.
Anyways, going on with my story... it's around 7:30 pm when my phone rings in the middle of a class. I look at my cell phone screen and read "Sexual Fantasy". It's him.
- Hi teacher.
- Hi student.
- Are you working?
- Yeah, I am giving class but I am almost done.
- Oh, I see.
- How was your MBA course today?
- Tiring...I left the birthday party yesterday at 4:00 am and had to be up at 8:00 am.
- Ouch...
- Did you guys go out yesterday?
- Nah, Ximena wasn't feeling very well in the stomach and I also had class to give early in the morning so we gave up on the idea. Though I was wanting to go out tonight...
- Are you?
- I don't know, I think so... Ximena already called me earlier on today but I was giving class as always... so I told her that I would phone her as soon as I get done with work. We were thinking about Amici's actually...
- I see... well, if you decide to go to Amici's let me know. Eu me animo!
- Okay then. I am going to finish my class over here and as soon as I get home I'll call Ximena and let you know what we've decided. But I am pretty sure we are going out tonight. I will phone you later just to confirm. Oh, do you mind coming to pick me up?
- No, not at all! Just let me know what time you want me to pass by.
- Thanks student! I am broke and don't have money to go paying taxi's... I spent wayyyyyyy too much this month. Not cool!
- Hahahha...that doesn't sound like you, but yeah, of course I can pick you up. I will be waiting for your phone call.
- Okay. Bye.
- Kisses. Bye.
Class over. Arriving home. Looking at the kitchen clock: 8:00 pm.
"Ah, it's sooo good to arrive home early after a long day's work! I wish I could arrive home this time every day. It would be a dream come true!"
I phone Ximena and confirm our outing that night: first stop will be at a bar famous for its superb caipiroskas and the high-class crowd it gathers. Second stop: Amici's - Fortaleza's most famous samba bar which packs out mainly on Saturdays nights to the point that it can sometimes get to be unbearable. I then phone Sexual Fantasy and ask him if he can pick up Ximena before coming to get me which he agrees to do on the spot.
And then there comes the part in which I need to get dressed. I had already planned a whole day in advance what I would be wearing, but as soon as I got dressed I decided that it was exactly what I didn't want to wear! And so from there went a whole "getting dressed" dilemma. I must have changed my clothes at least four or five times and when I finally decided on my clothes I noticed that I had less than 15 minutes do my hair, makeup, put on my sandals, grab some money and my ID. But in the end, looking myself in the mirror I was glad that I changed my choice on clothes. Black lace tie high heels, jean shorts, spaghetti string top t-shirt cor melanica and my hair up.
And punctual as always, fifteen minutes later, there is his car in front of my apartment and I am walking out of the gate and into his car. Ximena was already inside and talking animatedly.
- Hi Ximena. Hi student.
- Hi teacher! they both chorused.
- So Ximena, are you going to meet up with Hudson? I asked.
- I don't know. He wanted to meet up with me yesterday. He sent me a message but I took a long time to answer him so I think he is pissed off because of that.
- Hahahhaha... and you could care less right?
- Ah Christy, you know me too well!
- She does? Sexual Fantasy asked.
- Of course she does. Ximena confirmed.
- So, I said changing topics, where are we going?
- What do you think about that new bar that just opened? Sexual Fantasy inquired.
- I wanted to go to "Cauboi". Have you ever gone there Sexual Fantasy?
- No I haven't. I heard a lot about it but I have never been there.
- I always go there. The caipiroskas are the best in all of Fortaleza. Ximena announced.
- Amen to that! I agreed.
- So let’s go there then! And off we went...
Once arriving there we all sat down and ordered our drinks. Sexual Fantasy as always ordered his bottle of beer and I and Ximena had to order the famous caipiroska! It comes in a huge milkshake glass cup, but instead of milkshake it's filled up to the top with the most delicious caipiroska, full of pieces of kiwi and strawberries cut up inside. And the conversation started:
- Hey Christy, that guy sitting at the table next by is about to break his neck by turning around so many times to get a look at your legs. Ximena joked around.
Sexual Fantasy lowered his eyes to get a look at my legs, looked up catching my eye and laughed aloud.
- Let him break his neck then. I said caring less.
- You're evil teacher. Sexual Fantasy said.
- C’mon. What do you expect? For me to get all thrilled that the guy is getting all horny on my legs?
- Ah, quem mandou for you to wear those tiny jean shorts?
- Hah! Tiny is that dress the girl on the nearby table is wearing. If I so much as move my head to the side I can see not only her panties but also everything that is inside. I answered back.
Sexual Fantasy playfully moved his head to the side. - Talking about dresses that are too short, the other weekend I went out with a friend and his girlfriends and gosh, talk about short! I could see deep inside their souls if I wanted to!
- Do you mean deep inside their vaginas??? Ximena squealed.
- Hhahahahhaha. Of course he does. You never heard that expression Ximena?
- Thankfully NOT!
- That means you just learnt a new expression then. Sexual Fantasy said.
- Hey Christy, let's drink another caipiroska?
- Oohhh. Someone's are going to get drunk!!! Sexual Fantasy tantalized.
- Let me see... there comes two vodka shots in each of these huge cups, so two plus two makes four...altogether that will be four shots. Not to count the beers Sexual Fantasy will force me to drink once we arrive at the club. Yeah, why not! Waiter!!!
- Since when did you drink beer Christy? Ximena asked surprised.
- It's all Sexual Fantasy's fault. Blame it all on him!
- I only showed her what's good. Sexual Fantasy defended himself.
At midnight we got up from the bar, walking already a bit tipsy, got into the car and made our way to Amici's ready for a long night out. At the car, Hudson phoned Ximena and they planned to meet each other there which happened not more than ten minutes after we arrived.
While the both Ximena and Hudson stayed smooching and grabbing each one another; me and Sexual Fantasy hung around each other. He drank, I danced. I tried to drink some more, he tried to dance some samba. One thing that I am proud to say about myself is that I do consider myself a very good dancer - especially when it comes to samba. I know a lot of beautifully made Brazilian girls with large asses and thick legs that can give quite a samba show - but that after dancing a song or two they are already dead tired and have to sit down or stop for a good while. For me though, once I get started it's the opposite - I have a hard time stopping. I will dance until the whole club is stopped and staring at me which ends up in quite a show. I don't dance for all the attention that I get (though that of course is an extra incentive, hah!) but yes, because I like dancing. No, I love dancing! It's pretty much just like writing: even if not a single soul would read all my crazy stories and posts that I put up on my blog; that still wouldn't ever stop me from writing because I write for myself and writing is a big passion I have and something I do to calm my nerves and to take my stress out - not something to do to get recognition because if that were the case I would have given up on writing a whole longggggggg time ago. And it's the same with dancing. Many times I will dance while cleaning my room, cooking at home or hanging my clothes on the line. And it was no different today: Hudson encouraging me on with my samba dancing, Ximena joining in and Sexual Fantasy feigning uninterest. But even he wasn't able to help but comment: "- Ximena, I ask myself, if Teacher wasn't allowed to watch TV when she was young then how has she learned how to dance?!"
Honestly, the drink must have come up to my head pretty quickly because I decided that if Sexual Fantasy made a move towards me I would let him have a go. I would stay with him. Yes, I would kiss those yummy lips and I would give in. Not that I was sure that he wanted to stay with me - actually one thing that always pissed me and still does until today is that I don't know how much he actually likes me. Like, I don't know if he considers me nothing more than just a good friend, or if he wants to stay with me but doesn't because I am not like all the other girls that kiss his feet and fling themselves on top of him, or maybe he just gets horny on me here and there and then makes his slight moves or who knows, maybe he just is simply NOT into me and could really care less and this is all just in my head. But then again, if he isn't into me then why would he phone me earlier on, ask me out, give me a ride, treat me exceptionally well (and believe me, he wasn't always like this with me and he definitely isn't a guy to treat girls well just for niceness sake - nope, I can attest that that's just NOT him!). So with all those thoughts running in my head I felt insecure, weird and mainly unwanted because he just didn't make a move! FAIL! Ximena even joked around here and there about us staying but he didn't say much and just laughed around. Is that good or is that bad? Or is that just nothing at all?
Anyways, after a while I decided that I would go to the bathroom and leave Ximena and Hudson making out and Sexual Fantasy in his corner with his beer for a short while. As I was walking to the bathroom, from far off I spotted him. Yes, him. Mr. Perfect. Or so, after last post in which I talked about him: Mr. Not-So-Perfect.
Though I hate to admit him, even from far off I couldn't help but thinking that body and beauty wise he was more to the side of Mr. More-Than-Perfect. But I wasn't too willing to have to get an "out" or a "cold stare" like happened last time so I just walked straight forward without even trying to get his gaze or looking at him twice and walked straight inside the bathroom. Once inside there I calmed my nerves down and decided that if he wanted to talk with me he would have to make the move as for me, I would stay "na minha". When I walked out of the bathroom I noticed he wasn't where I had just spotted him a few minutes ago. I walked on to where Ximena, Hudson and Sexual Fantasy were and as soon as I reached them I shouted in Ximena's ear: - You would never guess who is here!!!
- OMG! The hot Greek God... Mr. Perfect, no?
- How did you know?
- Who else would it be?
- Hah. Pois é!
- Hey, will you buy me some water please?
- Sure. Give me the money.
I walked across the dance floor and off to the bar when I suddenly passed right in front of Mr. Perfect and our eyes locked one with another. I was so caught up in my thoughts about him that I hadn't even noticed that him and his friends were practically right in front of the bar. I just smiled coyly and walked away before he could get to say anything - or give me the cold treatment. But once standing in the line of the bar I noticed from the corner of my eye that he wouldn't stop looking towards my way and was mentioning me to his friends. I quickly bought my water and walked over to Ximena making sure this time to not pass by too closely from him.
We continued dancing and then decided to change spots and go close by the front of the stage where the band was playing. Once over there Ximena met up with some friends of hers and after meeting them all we stayed in the corner where they were making small talk and shaking to the music. And then out of the blue, once again I caught Mr. Perfect's gaze just that this time I didn't flee away from it. We both held the gaze just like the first time we met and kept it until he made his way to where I was. And once again it all happened oh so quickly. We said hi, hugged each other, he joked around telling me that I had disappeared and I answered him saying he was a bad liar and then - you got it! - There came the kiss!!! In that aspect nothing, absolutely nothing had changed. The whole chemistry was still there, the heat, the desire, the touch...arggggggggg, why did it have to be SO good, eh?!
- Christy there was something I wanted to confess to you.
- Go ahead!
- I didn't phone you before nor did I speak to you last time you were here because I was dating.
- You were what? I half playfully/half seriously shoved him aside.
- Yeah, since the first time I stayed with you I was dating someone - well kind of...the first time I stayed with you we had given ourselves a "time out" but then when I saw you again I had already gone back to being with her once again but was having a hard time in deciding if I was going to stay with her for good or not.
- I see. Are you sure you still aren't dating? Because for me, staying with a guy that is dating is a major "no-no". It just doesn't happen. Not that I will ever really know, but at least I can't say that I asked and tried, no?
- Sounds valid. But no, take my word for it, I am alone now. Whatever I once had is now gone.
- If you say so...
And that was enough. More than enough. We were back to grabbing ourselves wildly and every touch and every move felt too good to be true. Mr. Perfect then grabbed a piece of paper and asked for my phone number once again.
- I lost my cell phone a short while ago.
- And my friend jumped into the pool with my phone on New Year's.
- I guess we both don't have any luck then.
- At least with cell phones we don't!
And Sexual Fantasy just looked at me with the corner of his eye. As soon as I started staying with Mr. Perfect, not too much time later he left the club and I guessed, went back home. But I didn't think too much about it as I was more than glad being entertained by what I am absolutely sure was the hottest guy in the club.
- Christy, what do I have to do to see you again? What do I have to do to see you many and many other times again?
- You can start with seeing me once again... I am sure that after that one time you will know if you will get to see me the "many many times" again.
- Oh it's like that then, is it?
- Why wouldn't it be, no?!
- If I asked you out to watch a movie would you accept?
- Depends.
- Depends???
- Where. When. How.
- Do I have to meet your father first?
- Hah, what a question! My father doesn't dictate my life, you can be sure of that!
- But you do live with him don't you? If I have to I will even meet your father. I will wear one of those hot and stuffy button-up shirts and I will be very serious and even call him Sir. Will that work?
- Hummm... let me think... NO?! Mr. Perfect, my father was a hippie. I haven't been living with him for the past five years. I just came back to living with my parents 8 months ago and they could really care less about all those rules and regulations. As long as I am happy they are as well. They know me and trust what I do with my life, for them that is enough.
- Nice parents you've got there. Now I really want to meet them if all you say is true.
- It is. Don't worry about my parents though...before my parents you should worry about pleasing and making an impression on someone else.
- And who would that be?
- Why, me of course!
With that he cracked up, pulled me tightly towards him and gave me another one of those kisses of his that just took my breath away. Ahhhhh, life is good!
But all that is good comes to an end and at about 3:30 am Ximena wanted to go home and I told her I'd be going with her as well. I said bye to Mr. Perfect, heard him promise that he'd phone me the next day to plan something out and off I went with Hudson, Ximena and Hudson's friend to the car.
Ximena went in the front with Hudson and I went in the back with Hudson's horny porny friend. I don't know what his friend's problem was but I had to use my nails, hands and legs (not to mention verbal aggression) to keep him far away from me.
- Hey, what's your name?
- Joana Raimunda (the name I always use when I am trying to repulse a guy I am not the slightest interested in).
- No it's not. It's Christy. Hudson told his friend.
- Thanks Hudson! I said aloud.
- So Christy, horny boy started. Where were you all this time?
- In the club.
- Doing what in the club? How come I didn't see you there before?
- That's because while you were trying to grab a girl I was grabbing a guy... do you understand now?
Horny boy stayed quiet and I smiled inwardly proud of myself for having shooed him away so easily and quickly. Boy was I wrong! Ten seconds later he tries his new tactics.
- Man, you're Hotttttttttttttttttttttt!!!
- Valeu. Auto estima nota dez agora!
- Really, you are. I bet you were the hottest girl in the club.
- I feel real bad for all you men then. Bad nightmares you'll be having tonight that's for sure! But anyways, I am really thinking myself now after your corny compliment.
- Yeahhhhhhh whatever.... let me touch your hot body.
- Shooo...stay away. You're drunk. Drunk and horny.
- And you are delicioussssssss... I can't help but need to touch you!
- Ewwwwwww... sicko! Hudson help me out here. Your friend is getting gross on me.
- Ah Christy, I am sure you are more than able to handle the situation back there.
- Do I have the permission to get violent?
- Whatever you want. I let you put my friend in his place...that is, only if you are sure you don't want anything with him.
- Please Hudson, that isn't even a question!!! Eeeekkkkkkkk, get your hands off horny boy!!! I whacked his hand off my leg and slapped it hard.
- Ouch! That hurt! You are evil!!!
- Hahahhhaa... Ximena cracked up. Man, you don't want to mess with her. Christy is mean, believe me.
- After that slap I'll believe anything you say about her.
- Start by keeping your hands off then, horny boy. I said firmly. Remember, I am the hottest girl in the whole club, and hottest girls have the right to tell horniest boys in the club to obey them, ok?!
- I wouldn't mind obeying you if it meant doing other things.
- Disgusting. Where do you get that from horny boy? Can't believe those things actually come from your drunken head.
- Hummm???
- Hey man, we're here. Here is your apartment! Hudson opened the car's door for horny boy to get out.
- At last. God loves me...bye horny boy. Good luck with your horniness.
- Bye Christy. Hope to see you soon again...
- Uh huh... I said and shut the car's door firmly behind him. *Sigh of relief*
- Geez Hudson, each friend of yours is worse that the last one. Yikes!
Hudson and Ximena just laughed having a blast with it all.
They then dropped me off at home and I peeped inside my room, threw off my sandals and flung myself on my bed only to wake up past midday the next day. Grabbing my cell phone I look at its screen just to see a text message. But this time it wasn't from Mr. Perfect, but from none other than Sexual Fantasy: "Did you arrive well? I had to leave yesterday, sorry... Kisses."
The whole day today I didn't think about Mr. Perfect. Instead, as usual, I couldn't get my head off Sexual Fantasy. In the end I know I can't run away from my feelings. I like Sexual Fantasy more than I should and that makes me want to run away from him because I fear rejection, I fear getting hurt and I feel losing the great and wonderful friendship I have with him. I don't think I could stand taking the risk of staying with him and then just finding out that he was only horny on me - nothing else. That would be too much for my poor little heart. I rather instead just stay with Mr. Perfect, enjoy myself with him and have him as my little toy and make the most out of that. I don't know if that is right or wrong, but I do want to preserve what I have with Sexual Fantasy. I like him a lot and want something more than just a "one night stand" yet I know that I am asking for way too much and that it's just a dream and something that won't ever happen as I just am "sem chances". So I decided to once again try to forget it all, continue focusing on my friendship with him and accept that - at least it's better than nothing. Later on today, Sexual Fantasy phoned me and we talked quickly about his English class tomorrow...nothing too personal. Mr. Perfect... I am still waiting for his call... who knows he already found someone else to use his highly perfected kissing skills on. Kibom. I do rather Sexual Fantasy anyways...
In the end, when it comes down to Mr. Perfect and Sexual Fantasy, I ask myself, who will win??? The asnwer comes clear and quickly to my head: "They both will win, and you Christy, you will loose!"
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