GAY!!!

Gays.
Ok, starting off on this subject of gays... I've been thinking on writing this post for awhile but a few occurances of this week "me deu gas" to do so...
As I've mentioned in one of my older posts, I have a gay student at the hotel I give classes to twice a week. He's a young guy in his early twenties and not entirely bad looking. He is always wearing either a suit and tie or jean pants and a t-shirt in some shade of pink. But his famous trademark is his hair: thin, dark and parted straight in the middle and splatted on each side with slick guey gel - eekkk!!! When we were young, me and my brother named whoever wore the "oh so slimy hairdo" as "churchboy". It stuck and until today we use this name when reffering to men (or gays!) with such hair. :/
Anyways, last class Renato (the gay) arrived a bit early and so we started chatting a bit waiting for his classmates to arrive. At one moment, all of a sudden, he stops, pokes his nose upwards and starts pufing his nostrils back and forth "smelling the air" while I just stare too shocked to say much. He then announces:
-Maria Claudia is nearby. I know it just by the perfume she is wearing!
-WOW Renato! You have a good nose.
-Yes I do! I even know which perfume it is. Its called "Red fruits and Champagne" from Victoria's Secret. I know so because I have one just like it at home.
This time, despite my shock, I couldn't keep my mouth shut!
-You what??? You have a girl's perfume at home?
Little memory lapse...I momentarily forgot that the guy in front of me wasn't really a guy, but yes a gay!
-I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVEE (special emphasis on the "oooov"!) female perfumes!!!!!!!!!!! I have a whole collection at home: Victoria's Secret, Channel, Prada...
-Wow. you should spare one for your poor teacher on her birthday.
-Oh, I could never do that! I love my perfumes too much - they are all so special to me!!!
Okay...liking girl's perfume is already wrong, but special sentamentalism towards them is just too much...spare me!
But that wasn't the worst...last class everything seems to be going hunky-dory-doo and everyone is enjoying themselves as we have a conversation class being "Relationships and Marriage" the main subject. Then as a little extra, I ask each person to describe their husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend to the class. This goes by normally (with Renato attesting that he doesn't have any "special someone" in his life) when one of my students asks me straight out:
-How about you teacher? It's your turn now!
-Oh no... I answer, I am single.
But Carla wasn't going to let it off so easy: - Teacher, tell us then about the last guy that you liked...or the last guy you met!
-Okay then... And on I went to describe Mr. Perfect: "He is perfect. He is 26 years old, works as a vet, is from Santa Catarina, lived two years in the States, speaks both English and Spanish; is extremely hot, inteligent and fun. But there is a problem. I met him last Friday night and then on Saturday he sends me a text message. Stupid me wasn't able to hold herself and I phoned him on Sunday and we talked. But today is Thursday and since Sunday he hasn't phoned me even once - and I don't know what to do! Should I phone him or not?
Those last words had barely left my mouth when all of a sudden, Gay boy (Renato) declares:
-TEACHER! Phone him - because if you don't, I WILL!!!
My mouth dropped open wide and I gave a loud scream that must have echoed all the way out to the whole hotel:
-AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
And with this the whole class roared into laughter.
What can I say? Gays...The world would be another place without them! lolllllllllllllll

P.S. I didn't phone Mr. Perfect, yet I did make sure that Gay Boy didn't get his number!

Disclaimer: ALL NAMES ARE FICTITIOUS - dates, places and events are FACTS!!!